For those that have balls, and those that don't

My apolgogies for my absence.
I was on vacation in Vegas.
Yes, it included an In-N-Out stop.
But there's another thing that Vegas boasts:
Beautiful women.
None, sadly, are special lady friends.
Which brings me to this shirt.
That's marvelous.
Get it for someone who's strongly vaginal.
Get it for your free spirited friend.
Even if she's not yet special.
Perhaps for "fun and games?"
Or a chance at conception?
What do you have to lose?
$18, I guess.
That's exactly how much Donny had when he died.

Ball shammy.
For polishing.
It will cause envy.
Possibly, a date for Wednesday.
With that aforementioned SLF?
Use both hands.
Pump vigorously.
After polishing belly-shake optional.
Liam endorses it.
Hear it for yourself.
Only $15!

Jin-gle-Bells,
Je-sus-Thursts,
Li-am-stays-qui-et.

Bush-League-Shit,
Wal-Ter's-Fit,
AND-DON-NIE-PASSED-A-WAY-HEY!

Happy Happies to all.[TQ]